His touch felt like butterflies on my arm and I couldn’t stop smiling. He noticed, of course he did and, for a moment, that deep sadness, that endless solitude I saw in his eyes, seemed to melt.

“Hi. You probably don’t remember me.”

Oh, not only that I remember him, but I prayed to God to see him again. One more time. And now I wish I could hug him tight. A perfect stranger…I have no logical explanation and it’s completely out of my control, but he makes me happy simply by being near me. No need for more…

“I’m the one…with the book…and I think I scared you last time. I thought…there’s a coffee shop and it’s still early…you probably didn’t had coffee yet…and…I’m talking way too much…”

I’m looking down…my heart is saying yes. My heart is shouting YES. But…

“No, not like that…I saw…the wedding ring…and I would never…it’s just coffee. I know you belong to another…”

I don’t belong to him. 

“Of course you don’t…I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me around you. I say stupid things and I act like I would be on medication…or something…I’m sorry…I’ll just go…”

And, just like that, my heart wins. I’m taking his hand in mine, looking deep in his eyes.

I guess we both need some coffee.

I can actually see the excitement in his eyes. Then sadness again…I need to go beyond this sadness. I need to see inside…to climb this protective wall…

Why are you so sad? Even when you smile…

“Please…can I hold your hand?”

I give him my hand unhesitatingly and anyone who would see us now, would think that…But it doesn’t matter, what I feel for him is so innocent, so pure…

“You gave me faith last time. I’m such a mess…I cry at nights…and I was always strong. I don’t know why I tell you this…”

What happen to you? I want to help you, with anything you need. 

He looks down and I notice his old shoes and the same shirt washed over and over again until the colors are all pale…

I…if you need money…I can…

He pulls away his hand almost instantly and I feel so bad. There’s a fire in his eyes…dignity…pride?

“I do not need your money! Your money can’t buy life, do they? Can they buy time? Can they erase this death sentence?”

He shows me a piece of paper, but I can’t see because of my tears.

I’m sorry.

I’m running out crying and I know people are noticing. I probably lost my mind simply for being here, with a perfect stranger. A stranger I seem to…love? Did I really said that?

“I’m sorry. Please stay…I had no right…You said about having faith in each other…and I have faith in you…please…”

I wish I could help you, but I can’t. See…I’m not really a warrior. I cry at nights too. And I lost too many friends. My life is filled with ghosts and shadows. I can’t stand losing someone I love. Not again…

He seems lost, almost scared. But he looks straight into my eyes and he smiles.

“I would climb a mountain with you and I would fight death for you…Just to be that someone you love…”

You are.

His touch on my arm feels like butterflies.

“Hi. You probably don’t remember me.”

I look down…my vision before was too intense, too real.

No, I’m sorry…you’re probably mistaken me with someone else. 

“Oh…it’s alright…I thought…here…for you…you were nice and I thought…”

He gives me a piece of paper and disappears in the crowd. A portrait. Mine. With big eyes, filled with tears. And a mountain behind.

 

 

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10 thoughts on “I want to stand with you on a mountain!

  1. Extraordinary as always my friend. This glimpse at the torrid of emotions that we sometimes go through. As in the first perception, there can be that almost magical first meeting that leads to near love at first sight. A glance, a soft spoken word, it draws us in and taunts us to want to be the magic glue that just might be what the other person needs. To deny that can be so hard, even when you belong to another. It sometimes breaks our soul even. But, there are those times that we allow that encounter to actually lead somewhere…then we have a whole different set of feelings to deal with… Beautiful post Claudia

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you, my dear friend! I missed you, so nice to read your comment! You’re right…I never allowed myself to go there, to that different set of feelings…even if sometimes the inner struggle becomes unbearable and I question my own set of values. Part of being human…
      A warm hug for you and many blessings!

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you 😊 I just started to discover your blog and wow, I love Italian food and all the recipes you have there are amazing! Can’t wait to try a few of them! Have a nice day and thank you for liking my posts!

      Liked by 1 person

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