When silence isn’t quiet anymore

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Do you know that sometimes, when is dark,

-really dark

your ghostly eyes do light my path, like white, slow fires,

and in their flames I see desires?

-you think I’m blind?-

Is it true that, sometimes, when it’s cold,

-truly cold-

your icy lips do freeze the sweet and soft caresses

and all I hear is bitter guesses?

-you think I’m deaf?-

Have you see that, sometimes, when love dies,

-actually dies!-

your hopeless heart still speaks its free, wild prayer

and I am tortured by despair?

-you think I’m voiceless?-

Oh, don’t you know that silence screams the coldest blasphemy?

It turns my soul into a scene for wild obscenity!

It shouts into my helpless agony…

-that you are lost-

It isn’t quiet in its cruelty!

-When all we are is dust in savage wind,

you think I’m made of stone?-

 

 

All credits for the photo to Abigail from http://www.pixabay.com

 

 

 

 

 

Fearless in this love…

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I had a dream, the strangest you could ever think of… he said, gently taking my hand in his, smiling when my fingers met the warmth of his skin.

It was about hell…it opened its gates and black storms were released into the world. The trees were kneeling and worshiping its powers and a dark smoke covered the sky…he whispered, kissing my sleepy eyes, surprised by their peacefulness.

Winds were dancing around us, trying to break the invisible bond between your soul and mine, and I begged you…don’t let go of me, never let go…he sighted, pulling me closer, inhaling the perfume of my bare shoulders, trying to memorize its fragrance.

And you were fearless. 

But they were stronger, they broke the arms that held me and, slowly, your heart was breaking too…while mine was turning into ice…he gasped, planting butterfly kisses on my neck, surprised by the tremble in my body.

I saw you praying to an angry sky, I saw you pleading for love, I tried to say “I love you”…but demons twisted it into an insult. My tender touches, meant to sooth your bruises, hell turned them into violence…I saw you dying in my dream…he cried, pressing his head on my chest, listening to the beatings of my heart.

But you’re alive, more beautiful than ever, your eyes brighter than stars, rose petals on your lips, wild orchids on your skin…your heart creating music in my ear…You are here! You did not let go…you never will…You went to hell to find me and now we’re back home!

He turned aside, embracing my pillow. It was still wet from all the tears I cried over this darkness. The room is empty, there’s no one in my side of the bed. I’m still in hell, trying to find a love divine by nature…and he’s not here with me.

Where are you? Why are you never here when I’m lost in nightmares? 

Why can’t I wake up?

 

All credits for the photo to the talented Sam Williams from http://www.pixabay.com

Title inspired by https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_RHap8fvka8

Can you hear me crying?

68281533_2631272606903364_8485486330300596224_nPages filled with angry words…metaphors for an agonizing love.

Rooms filled with hateful screams…expression of a dying passion.

Hearts filled with emptiness.

They asked us to stay isolated and we did it! Many years ago…

 

Today is different, my love. This tremble inside me -a sign that I’m still alive- reminds me of warmth, so I’ll just take my favorite blanket and wrap it around my bare feet, celebrating my sweet memories…

Tonight is special, my dearest. This salty taste of tears on my burning lips -a sign that I’m still awakened- reminds me of sweetness, so I’ll just take a glass of red wine and some of the finest dark chocolate, honoring the woman in me…

Right now…that’s all I have, my precious. This beautiful silence in my restless soul -a sign that I’m still blessed- reminds me of rising above pain and ashes, so I’ll just play my favorite love songs, commemorating our bitter-sweet story…

 

And, as darkness settles in, my beloved, I’ll cry for all the missed embraces, for all the words that never found their way between us. For you and me -the isolated ones- who murdered love in too many cruel ways. Forgive me for needing you that desperately.

Can you hear me crying, my love? I’m right here, on the other side of the wall…

 

 

 

Photo from my personal collection

Why do fairy-tales fail, baby?

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Your eyes, my love, they shine in golden, vibrant colors, with all the kindness in the Universe, and I should feel blessed. My hero, the one who traveled through time and space just to find me, you’re looking into my soul with such tenderness…

Who is her? The girl you’re searching in me?

Your hands, my love, they’re warm and gentle, caressing my bare skin in soft, sweet touches, and I should feel safe. My prince of a far-away kingdom, the one who fought endless, pointless echoes of this tragedy called life, just to love me…

Where is her? The girl you thought I am?

Your words, my love, whispers of hope and devotion, little secret miracles, they’re nesting in my soul, resting within me, living through every beating of this restless heart, and I should feel healed. My destiny, the one I thought forever lost and, yet, you defied all rules just to be my shelter…

How is her? The girl you hoped I’d be?

Is she happily smiling when you kiss her burning lips, just like I am, in all my dreams?

Does she whisper your name in the sweetest yearn for passion, just like I do, in all my fantasies?

Could her arms hold you fearlessly, knowing she’s yours eternally, like I would, in a perfect fairy-tale?

Would you love her, like you’d never love me? 

Your story, my love, it resonated with mine and, for a brief moment, I dreamed I was a princess. I should feel grateful, and, yet, it broke me inside…

 

 

All credits for the photo to the free photos website http://www.pixabay.com

 

If you are not a warrior…

chess-2215836_960_720You and me –us- we were born in times of war.

You found me on a bloody battlefield, barefoot and crazy,

Laughing in the face of hurricanes,

Cursing the tragedy of falling too deep, too quick, too much!

I took your hand, –asked for your heart- I saw you trembling.

My dear, don’t love me if you’re so afraid of pain!

 

You and me –us– we survived winters and wolves.

My scars grew heavier, yes…I was bitten!

And being wild became my only nature, oh, my love…

You redefined sweetness for me, in terms of burning flames and fire!

When it was love, –your love– my only source of heat.

Darling, don’t love me if your soul is frozen to the grounds!

 

You and me -us- we killed each other on a battlefield.

Victims of evil shadows, we thought we’re fighting loneliness

And, yet, your knife tore me apart…

You broke me just to drown into my tears?

Aren’t we silly? You and me?

My love…don’t love me if you’re meant to kill my dreams!

 

Now don’t be sad, you’ll be in all my poems,

When lonely nights remind me of my loss.

See, you and me –us– were never meant to be heroes

In this war between heart and mind.

I’ll always wonder how it would feel to have someone fighting for me

-against all fears and inner demons-

-against all odds-

Don’t love me…if you’re not a warrior.

 

 

 

All the credits for the photo go to the free photos website http://www.pixabay.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

The invisible girl

woman-3299379_960_720“Maybe I died today.”

A car almost hit her and then, unusual and frightening, her best friend wasn’t responding to her messages. She tried to call a few other friends, but some rejected the call, some were busy, some just ignored the sound of their yellow screens.

So, here she is, at this crowded mall, spinning and laughing, pretending that her red curls have a life of their own.

“When did I die? How did it happen?”

She said it very loudly, but no one turned to see her. A world of strangers, all addicts to their yellow screens, walking like zombies, bumping into her, walking over her shadow, without noticing her. At all.

So she starts singing.

“Red curls, red soul, red lips. Oh, that red lipstick that I always wanted and never bought! It’s too red! Too red for me! And now it’s too late…because I’m…DEAD!”

She dances in front of the shoes store.

“Red shoes that I never tried on! They go perfectly with the red lipstick I never bought! And I’ll dance to my very end! But…hey! It did happen sometime earlier today!”

And her dance steps turned into tears.

The sky was already darkening when she went home. Where it smells like cookies and Christmas, music and the best coffee, his strong, loving arms and love. It feels like her safe place. It feels like warm.

“A funny thing happened today…I was at the mall and no one saw me, then no one answered to my calls. It was weird, I felt like being invisible…”

She reaches out to touch him, but he stays cold and mute, trapped between the yellow screen and a frozen inner world.

“I definitely died…”

She grabs the little mirror from her purse, just to smash it to the floor, breaking it into a million little pieces.

(“I know, I know what to do now…Red lips, red eyes, red soul, red blood…”)

The sharp little piece of glass feels alive in her hand. So is the pain. And the blood pulses faster, hotter, stronger! More vivid than it ever pulsed through her veins!

And no, the invisible girl did not die that day.

Her world did.

 

 

The image is taken from the free photos website http://www.pixabay.com

I’ll be there to protect you!

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I saw you running away again, I saw you hiding your eyes, so I had to come…Why are you smiling, here, in the darkest corner of your empty room? No one can see you, no one but me…the ghost of your years to come, so, why are you still smiling?

The show you put on every day is quite beautiful, the mask shines so bright in the moonlight…yes, you got their standing ovations! But here, where no one applauds, why do you keep wearing it?

You thought your love is a lullaby, to cradle your soul through all the insecurities and hurt, so you sang it all alone in the rain…but here, where no one hears your voice, why can’t you stop singing?

You swore that life is all about giving, so you offered the best of you -and all for free-, just to learn that he’s fed up of your generosity! So here, where no one takes your given heart, why don’t you quit offering?

Who am I, you keep asking…

I’ll tell you one thing…your bitterness created me.

My hands feel cold, wet and slippery…your tears.

My lips taste like fresh, salty blood…red like your cuts, sad like the remaining scars.

My hair is made of silken ropes…your nightmares.

And my heart, oh, my heart…I guess loneliness never had a heart!

Yes, I am a ghost and I’m damn sure I ain’t leaving! I’ll keep haunting you and I’ll keep frighten you! I’ll be the arms that wont stop holding you…I’ll be that one reason you need to raise your eyes and your voice! I’ll challenge you to be honest! I’ll be there to protect you, when there’s no one else…

And don’t you dare dying!

I am the ghost of your years to come. I am your choice, your light perverted into darkness. Stop smiling, it’s time to take off all of your masks. It’s time to fall…and to pray…to love and to trust…to believe and to discover.

It’s time to live. Differently.

 

Hey, little pigeon…

a8952913b7ffd282a36f978304334867Tell me about the place you’re flying to, it must be so beautiful! You have the wings of an angel, my little friend…could they carry me over the blue horizons? I really miss the love now…

Come, sweet little pigeon, come closer to my heart, this story I’m about to tell is not for fragile souls! Innocent eyes…could they see inside me, would they forgive the light turned into darkness? I really want to believe now…

Precious little wonder, have you ever lost yourself into a blossomed garden? Mesmerized by the perfume of paradise, charmed by the rose’s smile in the gentle breeze…you just stay there, praying it’ll last forever. Were you ever in love?

Ever dancing with the golden rays that cradled your whispers? Ever kissing the traces of light when the sky is raining upon you with petals of gold? Ever feeling your heart bursting in million little pieces, all carrying a love you’d call eternal?

And if you ever knew this kind of light, and if you ever lived this kind of happiness, and if you ever loved this strong…

…what would you do if the blossomed flowers would die under the cruel gaze of a careless sun?

…if the garden of paradise would turn into dark and that’s not even a damnation you could fight with…it’s just…home…

…and if eternity is just an empty feeling, a hollowing pain of something so rare and precious, for ever lost…

What would you do, sweet little pigeon, with a love so deep and powerful, so secret and unfulfilled that it will eventually murder you?

Hey, little pigeon, where are you flying to? please stay…why is the light in you fading away, why is your brave heart weakening…is it me? Don’t…my angel…just don’t…

…don’t drink the salty water pouring from my eyes, sweet little bird, I never meant to be your poison…

 

 

I found the image at: https://ro.pinterest.com/pin/59672763798557691/activity/tried

 

 

Eternity in blue

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If life is just a journey, I guess we both got wrong,

Just sitting by each other when wind and rain got strong.

We should have run together, to find where we belong!

To realize the meanings of our endless song…

 

If people are just dreamers, I guess we both are mad,

‘Cause words that used to heal me, are making me so sad…

When all I feel is nonsense and all you say is bad,

Your judgement and my sentence – that’s all you need to add…

 

If world is just a staging, I guess we both are brave,

I’m acting like my heart is not an empty cave…

And you pretend your love was more than just a wave!

But here we are still trying when nothing’s left to save…

 

If love is just illusion, I guess we both are weak,

We carry on by hoping for something so unique,

Love letters turned to candles inside our hearts to keep

Such perfect words of kindness, but we refuse to speak!

 

If faith is just a symbol, I guess we both are dying…

If love is just illusion, then why do we keep trying?

If world is just a staging, then were you only lying?

If people are just dreamers, why did we learned the flying?

If life is just a journey, when will we stop denying

 

This pain that burns inside me?…this is my only truth…

The reason I’m still living eternity in blue…

Even if life’s not worthy, I choose to be with you.

 

 

 

 

I found the image at: https://www.rocksforkids.com/stargazing-for-kids/

 

 

 

 

 

While you are sleeping…

Dark WatersA world is ending and another one is reborn…the new one is made of thin shadows, vulnerable and airy, with one purpose only: to keep me safe ’till morning…Do you see the shadows?

An empire burns to its grounds and another one starts rebuilding from ashes…the new one is fragile, made of colors and dreams, imaginary characters with one desire only: to hold me tight ’till morning…Do you see the kings’s castle, made for me only?

A life sacrifice itself on the altar of good will and another one plays wild, twisted, tormented games, with one freedom only: to make me happy ’till morning…Do you see me dancing with my demons?

While you are sleeping, they fail. The shadows, the kings, the games. But you can’t see me crying out scared, scratching my knees on impossible walls, dying inside…while you dream.

You leave a door wide open, so that I could run away every night, terrified by the sound of your peaceful breathing. See, my love, your peace became my nightmare, a war I cannot win, nor survive, while you are sleeping.

Tears fall into an ocean of broken goodbye notes, but your sweet dreams wont sail the troubled waters. I’m left here, with the monsters and I’m sorry…there’s no way I could ever fight them, so I just become one myself, while you are dreaming.

Our bond breaks to the point of no returning and I’m someone else’s love…while you quietly smile in the safety of your bed. And I’m more awake than ever…with him.

While you are sleeping, I’m powerless…drowning in black waters, desperate enough to miss the same chains I used to hate. The old golden cage that used to be my home. But you don’t need this drama, in your perfect nocturnal harmony. Do you?

…so I just kiss your forehead, I tuck you in and turn the lights off…

Good night, my love. Goodbye.

 

 

 

I found the image at: https://www.deviantart.com/kylu/art/Dark-Waters-6635387